High School Fads, 1944
Ok so now I’m on the look out for lesbians with hair bows in the back
I just like how the bow on the left is a ‘signal and a chllange’ it’s like yeah, Betty’s been going steady with Tommy for a few weeks now, but let’s see if Ronny can step up his game before Betty becomes a right bow kind of girl
can i use ‘she wears her bow in the back’ as a euphemism now?
It’s funny how after you love someone and they leave, even after you forget their voice or never saw their face or can’t remember their laugh or their eyes, a word from a stranger or from a desk mate or a stray comment from a new crush can call to mind that person so vividly, so viciously.
And isn’t it funny, isn’t it funny how every love after reminds you of him, makes you wonder if you just have a type or if you’re trying to find the boy you lost, find him in the boys around you now. If you lost your world and are trying so very, very hard to build it from the ground up with the echoes of a half remembered three in the morning chat and scraps of smart boys you meet all around who never quite compare.
I’m so tired of these ghosts of you still in my life. Every time I think that I can let go of you finally, like you let us go, I’ll look at him or at him and there you are again in a laugh or a sardonic grin and there you are again, that hole in my chest I will never, maybe, fill.
1. Date a boy who makes you happy, but marry him only if he makes you laugh deep-belly rumbles that hurt your ribs as they expand outwards. Date him when he sees that you’re hurting and he gives you a moment to feel that pain like a handprint spreading across your consciousness, marry him only if he can make you smile even while you’re gross sobbing. The world is not a kind place. You will feel a lot of pain. Make sure you are with someone who makes it all bearable. Humor is an excellent gauge of intelligence. Life gets boring. Find someone who makes the banal interesting.
2. Make sure he has scars on the back of his hands, it’s a good sign he has experience either fighting or making things - creation is an act of selflessness and bruised knuckles are a good sign he knows how to defend himself. You’ve got too much soul to be handled by someone who has never been passionate. If he’s never thrown a punch, let him at least have tasted the insanity of bringing an idea into existence. Rough palms are better than soft ones, they have been salted by this earth and made into leather. Callouses are evidence he has lived, that he has broken skin and been in pain over and over and over again and still came back to the source of it. People rub against each other. Don’t marry him if he can’t handle even a little blister.
3. Before you say yes, get him angry. See him scared, see him wanting, see him sick. Stress changes a person. Find out if he drinks and if he does, get him drunk - you’ll learn more about his sober thoughts. Discover his addictions. See if he puts you in front of them. You can’t change people, baby girl. If they are made one way, it doesn’t just wear off. If you hate how he acts when he’s out of it now, you’re going to hate it much worse eight years down the road. You might love him to bits but it doesn’t change that some people just don’t fit.
4. Trust your instincts. If he ever makes you feel unsafe, don’t make excuses, just get up and leave. That’s all there is to it. It’s better to be safe than sorry.
5. If he puts money before you, he’ll keep pushing you to the bottom of the pile until you become his last priority. It’s one thing if he can’t afford what you want, it’s another if he has the cash but won’t spring for a box of Chicken McNuggets. Money and love are arch enemies. 62% of divorces occur due to economic strain. Make sure keeping you is more important than his 401k.
6. How a man treats animals is a good indicator of how he treats children. If you see him raise a hand to a dog, pack your things into a little black bag. Animals at their worst are only half as annoying as a toddler on their best behavior. Your kids will be beautiful, but they will also misbehave. Same goes for waiters and hotel maids - if he’s rude to those who are working for minimum wage, it says a lot about how he sees himself. Patience is rare and so important. If he’s not forgiving to a dog, he’s not good for your kids.
7. If he isn’t in awe of you, he doesn’t deserve you. You are my little girl and you were born perfect. If he can’t see that, it’s his loss. There is someone who thinks your flaws power his heart. Be strong. If he asks you to change, be like like rock of your birthstone, do not waver. You are wondrous just the way that you are.
behind the scenes, before coffee,
before the sun, when your hair
is a fright and your skin
is still dented by the mattress seam.
I want to touch you then,
when you’re prickly and unshaven,
when you’re half dressed, or less,
when you’re unmade and distracted
and every bit yourself. I want to see you
getting yourself ready for others.
I want to live in that place. I want to
be with you, behind the scenes, knowing
I’m not one of the others.
Peregrine (via lostwithmargaret)
NEW noise canceling headphones that are so good at blocking out sound that they even prevent you from listening to your own music, forcing you to bask in the whispers of the forgotten gods until you begin to hear your own brain falling apart as it descends into madness
Placeholder (Acoustic) -The Story So Far